The 500 - #460 - Hole - Live Through This

I was inspired by a podcast called The 500 hosted by comedian Josh Adam Meyers. His goal, and mine, is to explore Rolling Stone's 2012 edition of The 500 Greatest Albums of All Time. 

My plan (amended). 

• 1 or 2 records per week & at least 2 complete listens.
• A quick blog post for each, highlighting the important details and a quick background story.
• No rating scale - just an effort to expand my appreciation.

Album # 460

Album Title: Live Through This
Artist: Hole
Released: April, 1994
My age at release: 28
How familiar am I with it: Less than I thought
Song I am putting on my Spotify Mix: Doll Parts
Great Lyric: 
"I want to be the girl with the most cake

He only loves those things because he loves to see them break

I fake it so real I am beyond fake

And someday you will ache like I ache. (Doll Parts)

This journey through Rolling Stone's 500 Greatest Albums of All Time has been incredible so far. Discoveries have been made and opinions have been changed and this record is no exception. If you had asked me about it two weeks ago, I would have dismissed it, likely with a quip disparaging the lead singer, Courtney Love - perhaps unfairly pigeonholing her as a vulgar addict who rode to minor success on the coattails of her late husband, rock legend Kurt Cobain. 

After an honest listen on the elliptical last week, I was forced to reconsider everything. This is a great album featuring top-level musicianship, including Courtney Love, whose powerful voice runs the gambit from palpable anger to authentic vulnerability. 

During the past two weeks, I've listened to this album multiple times while doing research into the it, the band and Courtney Love. I've confronted myself with the question: "Why did I dislike her so much that I refused to give this record its due?" 

There are many on line articles and discussion threads listing her unlikeable behaviours. Until recently, I believed the following...

• Her fame seemed to be a by-product of her marriage to Nirvana front man Kurt Cobain.
• Conspiracy theories aside, it was easy to blame her for Cobain's suicide in 1994.
• She feuded for years with Dave Grohl, a former band mate of Cobain, who is heralded by many as the nicest guy in Rock and Roll.
• She was a sloppy, drunken mess even when claiming to be sober - best evidenced by this appearance on the Comedy Central Roast of Pamela Anderson. 

These past two weeks have compelled me to re-evaluate my views and have made me wonder if I would have held a male musician with the same contempt. Slowly, my arguments have been dissolved.

• The album name, Live Through This, is apt. She has lived an incredible, often brutal, life.
• She was performing as a musician and actor long before she met Cobain. She even fronted the funk-metal band Faith No More in 1982 at 18 years of age.
• Cobain was a heroin addict who was struggling with recovery. His mental health challenges are well documented. To blame Love for his suicide is categorically unfair. It's akin to blaming a loss in a 7 game playoff series to a single mistake by a player.
• Grohl and Love made amends in 2014 when Nirvana was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. They both say they regretted the acrimony and dismiss it as an unfortunate byproduct of youth.

My research also led me to gain a better understanding of the Riot Grrrl Movement of the early 90s. Originating in the Pacific Northwest (not far from Love's hometown of Portland, Oregon) this underground, feminist punk movement encouraged women to express themselves in the same way that men had for years. Bands such as Bikini Kill, Bratmobile and Heavens to Betsy addressed issues that included rape, domestic abuse and sexuality. They wore short skirts, ripped fishnet stockings and combat boots. They were vegans who abstained from alcohol and drugs. They were part-punk and part-political, employing a grassroots movement aimed at empowering women. More importantly, they offered young girls an alternative, not only to commercially produced boy bands, but also the unrealistic images of beauty which bombarded them in media daily.

Although only tangentially connected to the Riot Grrrl movement, Love was in the vanguard for female empowerment long before The Spice Girls commercialized feminism and diluted it with the catchy, but manufactured notion of Girl Power.

I've realized that, at 27, I wasn't ready for Courtney Love's brash, vulgar and maniacal punk rock persona. Refusing, subconsciously, to give her the same latitude (or even respect) I'd extend to male counterparts exhibiting similar behaviours.

• Why is Cobain remembered as a tragic genius who fell victim to drug addiction while Love has been seen as a pathetic addict and unfit mother?
• Why do we celebrate the madness of The Who's late drummer Keith Moon as wild and eccentric while Love is seen as unhinged and vulgar?
• Why are the legendary sexual conquests of musicians like Vince Neil, Gene Simmons & David Lee Roth lauded while confident sexuality expressed by a woman is viewed as obscene and shameful?

The other day, a man passed me wearing a T-shirt emblazoned with a photograph of Johnny Cash angrily flashing his middle finger toward an unidentified cameraman. It is widely regarded as an iconic moment in which Cash's unbridled, fiery passion has been unleashed. We identify with him as a regular guy who has finally lost his patience with an unjust system.

There are many pictures of Love flashing her middle finger. I used to view them through a lens of judgment and disdain. I don't anymore and I realize that Live Through This is clear evidence of Love's unbridled, fiery passion...lashing out at injustices I failed to recognize in my youth.